Why I hate accounting...

I spent about 4 hours of my day today entering in data into Quicken.  Or should I say, correcting data that was already entered into Quicken.  Now I like Quicken's ease of use, but having to fix the work of others for a 3 year accounting period?  This is where I draw the line.

 I have never been the hugest fan of numbers.  In fact, one can say I hate them.  That is why I studied logic in college to satisfy the math requirement.   How ironic then that I have worked for a CPA firm and spend so much of my day now working on accountings.

Yet I guess we all have things in life that we never expect doing.  Does that mean we have settled for less?  Or is life simply taking us on paths for own good?

What in hell is wrong with people?

So I was waiting for the bus today and heard the sirens of an ambulance running down 2nd Avenue and then turning up Madison (for non-Seattleites, this is relevant, since these are very busy street at rush hour).  I watched as countless motorists, and even some oblivious pedestrians, did nothing to get out of the way of the ambulance.  So I ask you, what the hell is wrong with people?

I can imagine these same people not moving out of the way of the ambulance being the same ones complaining that ambulances and police never get anywhere quickly enough.  Yet they cannot connect the dots in their head that they are the cause of the delays in other emergencies.  I should no longer be surprised that I live in a country where its citizens twice voted for George W. Bush.

So the point of tonight's rant & rave?  People are stupid.  The end.

Futility of the heart

In returning to the tradition of my more cynical blogs, tonight  I am going to have a bit of a rant about the futility of trying to find your soul mate in this world.  For over a year now I have had feelings for a friend who, like the blog pic tonight, remains just out of reach.  Not only is this beginning to get extremely frustrating, but I am just about ready to spill my guts to him in a less than tactful fashion.

I have dropped hints, I have had friends investigate, and I have been getting mixed signals from him that do not make sense to me in the least.  So why after a year do you ask that I feel the need to let the truth set me free?  Well, let's just say that after how 2007 has kicked my ass, I feel like kicking it back some.

I have referred to this friend to my personal confessor as kryptonite, since my power of profiling seems oddly unable to crack his shell.  The personal confessor believes this is a sign that he is the one.  For me, it is just a frustration that needs to be corrected.  Win or lose, who the hell knows what will happen, but I will get this resolved before the end of this year.

Here I am again...

Today marks my life coming full circle.  In 2000 I was in an inconvenient situation and today, I was reminded that I am once again in that same place.  There is a theory that our body regenerates every 7 years.  Based on my poor math, that means I am in the return cycle a few years early.

I am beginning to go retreat into that analytical place that is very dark and scary.  The same place prompted me to create an Access database on the men of my past in an attempt to decipher the patterns.  It is this same place that makes me wonder if I will ever be able to find the right man for me.

Melodramatic or melancholy, does it really matter when you life is in a cyclical repeating pattern that never seem to come to an end?   

Unexpected surprises

Once again, out of the blue, the Internet has provided me a surprise -- a new friend.  Quite unexpectedly, and on a whim, I messaged someone online and he was not only responsive, but turned out to have a lot in common with me.  Just when I was feeling pretty low about so many things in my world, the Internet gave me an early Christmas present.

Now I am not trying to say that this will turn my life around and make right all the wrongs, but it is far better than turning to drinking, drugs, or any of my normal vices.  It is reassuring that there are still nice, kind and gentle people out there in the world and I have to give my kudos to the Internet for once again connecting me to them.

Should it surprise me really that the Internet helps me in such ways?  The Internet is really an introvert's best friend, since we can be connected to any one, any time, any place.  For introvert's it is a way to be part of the outside world without leaving our comfort zone.  God bless us, everyone!

A most Faustian deal

The story of Faust, a man who sells his soul for worldly gain, only to realize at the end he may miss it, is timeless.  I find myself now in a similar Faustian situation which my head knows may be a bad idea, but my heart is willing to try in order to give myself some peace to my soul.  Can there be any more eternal struggle than that?

I have fought hard and long to achieve some semblance of stability in my life and I feel lately that it is all slipping away from me -- again!  Several times before this cycle has played out and each time I have not come out for the better on the other end.  But this time I hope it will be different.

Unlike the times before though, I am in a solid career path, I think.  I am in a place where I no longer fear being along, I hope.  I am fighting for more than just me now, I know.  Oh what a tangled web we weave...

End of the line

Have you ever had one of those days where you just felt that you could not handle one more set-back with screaming?  I am not talking about ending one's life, but I mean you just have had so many continuous ups and downs that you just wonder how much more there is left for you to have to overcome.  Seems like my life is just once giant cycle that repeats itself so often that I wonder if I am secretly on a cosmic soap opera.

This year has been a very difficult one for me for a variety of reasons.  At every turn I have accepted the change and rolled with the punches.  But lately it seems like I am just getting kicked in the teeth more than my fair share.  I needed the past few days to physically and mentally recover and maybe I should have waited a few more days before getting back in touch with the world.  

No matter what weird cosmic or fatalistic drama is going on with me right now, I need to just remember that I have my health (sort of), my animals, and friends and family who love me.  The rest be damned.

A new friend from an unlikely source

Who knew that a passing interest that became a fascination and hobby could lead to making new friends.

Simple reasons for being along on a holiday

When I was growing up holidays in my house were not happy, joyous, or times to be thankful for family and friends.  Our holidays were the reminder of lost loved ones and the effects said losses had on those left behind.  In short, holidays in my house as a child were times I dreaded year after year.  I had hoped that holidays as an adult would be better since I would be spending them with the family I made, but I was wrong. 

After 3 years of spending the holidays with my now ex-in-laws, I spend last year away in Canada with friends.  I should have known that it was a first sign of the inevitable end of that dysfunctional meretricious relationship after 4.5 years.

So today, on this Thanksgiving Day, I decided that I needed to be alone.  I needed time to clear my head and to regroup after what has turned out to be a very difficult year for me.  Right, wrong or indifferent, I think this was the right decision for me since I am feeling more hermit like than normal.  Even my animals have noticed the change in me and I am hoping that in time I can find my way back to the person I thought I was and the person I still want to be in the future.  

Fingers crossed!

A long time in coming...

...and I just need some good old fashioned rest and relaxation. 

Great television that is educational as well...

...and it is about the British -- what could be better?

Muchas gracias

I am so grateful to Brazil for creating my friend who came to visit me tonight.

More than a modern day babysitter...

...it is a surrogate boyfriend on lonely nights.

At the crossroad of Unexpected and...

...what the hell have I gotten myself into this time?

Dinner with friends and family...

...one of my friends, and a friend's family, but still a nice get away nonetheless.

Never been good at this...

...especially when I am the one doing the interviewing.

A new player to the cast of characters

The roommate's cousin arrived in town today and she is lovely.

Absent minded to a point

Forgetful yes, but always properly clothed.

Catching up on my soaps...

...who knew so much could happen in a fictional town in Pennsylvania.

The rain maker undone

He partied long and strong and then the draught came upon him again.

Here it is...

...the Miss USA/Miss Universe pageant marathon.

It's raining man...

...and the rain maker is in town.

My own personal support and friend in one

Now there is something the other guys can't offer can they...I don't think?

Regular blogging to return...

...someday.

Is it confusion or...

...bats in my belfry.

Perfect description of my state of being...

Head not in the clouds, but head of clouds.

And yet another euphemism

And so begins a series of saying the same thing...

Overtime...

...it sucks.

Memories of another day...

Amazon.com used to put this sort of thing up when there was a system outage in the food old days so seemed like a good idea for my own mental system outage.

How do you spell relief

Tonight, it was not R O L A I D S...